Who'd Have Known
by Cait'Elizabeth'Storm
Summary: There were many reasons I'd been roped into this shit show: 1, Albus had lost a bet. 2, I felt sorry for Malfoy and his unrequited feelings for Rose Weasley. And 3, I clearly don't know how to say no. Throw in me being Scorpius Malfoy's fake girlfriend, falling for James Potter and trying to pass my exams. Bloody hell, I blame Albus Severus Potter till the day I die.(OCxJSP)(SMxRW


**The one with where Saskia is 'tragic'**

There were many reasons I'd been roped into this shit show. One, my best friend had lost a bet to Scorpius Malfoy. Two, I felt bad for him because he really did fancy Rose and even though he's a self-obsessed, womanising wreck and his reputation needed a face lift, I'd been nice enough to help him out. Begrudgingly, I might add. And three, I was an average, fly on the wall Ravenclaw with nothing better to than study, get high grades and apparently my best friend (cough, soon be ex-best friend if she carries on, cough) had deemed me perfect. What, with my charming personality, lack of social life and my complete lack of allure. So in other words, I was being passed like an old hag to the nearest bloke who could stand me.

Let me explain, Scorpius Malfoy is a very observant guy. He'd been the plot twist in everyone's life. Firstly, he'd befriended Albus Potter (my previously mentioned best friend). Secondly, he'd been sorted into Gryffindor. And thirdly, he'd gone and fallen in love with a Weasley.

So when he'd bet Albus seven galleons that Gryffindor would lose to Ravenclaw in last weeks Quidditch match, and Albus had lost. I'd been offered up like bait. The reason for this is that I'm not usually Malfoy's type; not the giggly, airhead type but more… me.

To be his bloody fake girlfriend to make Rose jealous.

Malfoy was staring at me strangely when I joined him in the library (blame Al). Which, like, didn't offend me nor was it shocking, I wasn't exactly the person who's be seen talking to him. His expression was mostly unreadable, his blonde hair in his eyes and his cold grey eyes never wavering from me. He was thin, tall and had his legs on the table. I was quite intimidated because, y'know, it's not often you're sat in front of an attractive person who could probably sue you with one letter to his father.

"So you're Saskia?" I couldn't tell whether or not to be put out that he didn't even know who I was. Sure, I wasn't exactly popular or well known like the Potter-Weasley clan but I'd been in his school year for the past five years. I smoothed down my uniform, trying not to think about the mass of red hair on my head and the awkwardness of my gangly legs. "I thought you were shorter."

Oh, yeah, that made some sense. I was 5'9 and usually towered over a lot of people. But in seriousness, Malfoy looked taller from far away. Well, you win some and you lose some and apparently he'd lost a couple inches off his height and probably several brain cells from all the times he'd been walloped by Rose Weasley.

"Soooo," Malfoy drawled painfully slow, suddenly leaning forward in his seat. I, by the way, had yet to sit down and was stood awkwardly in case I needed to make a swift exit. Which, in all honesty, seemed very likely. "Al lost a bet and here you are. Which he's probably told you and you've probably already thought of a thousand ways of how you were going to get out of this. If it's any consolation, you aren't my type."

Gee, thanks, I'd have never have noticed. Mainly because I was as gangly as a baby deer, had flat hair and was pretty boring. I'd seen Malfoy's usual calibre of girl which their shiny hair and cute faces and immaculate appearances. They were all gorgeous. Until he was a complete dick and chucked them after a couple of days and a swing by a broom closet later.

"None taken," I managed to choke out, folding my arms across my chest and leaning against one of the floor to ceiling shelves. Malfoy regarded me with steely eyes and I was suddenly overly conscious of my wonky eye and knobbly knees. I don't know why but he was staring and I was feeling so uncomfortable. In fact, I couldn't help but call him out on it, "Dude, behave, you're looking at me funny and I'm not feeling it."

Smooth, real smooth.

It's a good job I didn't want to work for the Daily Prophet or anything. I'm not eloquent in the slightest.

"Listen, we don't have to be friends," Malfoy ignored me and continued with his speech. I picked my nails and pretended not to be freaking out. "Literally, all you have to do is play the besotted girlfriend role, pretend you like me and that's it. Apart from a few Hogsmede dates and spending time in the joint common room-" (Screw interhouse unity for all it's worth. I blame Harry Potter) - "you get to do whatever it is you do with your life in the first place."

"Thanks," I mutter sarcastically, wondering why on earth Al would subject me to this. "You might want to note down that Rose isn't one to get jealous easily and that you need to get your shit together. Because having a girlfriend won't make her love you and it doesn't make you a decent human being. You can't force something."

"I'm completely aware that Rose is incapable of feeling jealousy. I've made mistakes and I'm sure you have in your life. So, really, think of this whole situation as me trying to right a wrong."

"And how's that?"

"Well you're pretty tragic."

Whoa, hold up, narcissus. We can't all be perfect and have good genes and enough time to charm our hair to lie perfectly all day.

"Think of this as you being introduced as a new person. Sure, girls will hate you and you'll probably hate yourself by the end of it, but that's okay but you might have your Hogwarts fifteen minutes of fame from this."

What a prick. I couldn't even tell if he were being serious or not, so I didn't give him a response. He continued to smirk in my direction and I really did debate all the ways I could kill him using only the items in this room. So far I had ten. Scorpius Malfoy was rude and arrogant and needed therapy on how to be nice to people. Also, I didn't mind the person I was, why would I need to be reintroduced as a new person?

It's a good job he's pretty. He doesn't have the brains for much else.

"Sure, you're reasonably pretty if you actually did something with your hair and apparently you're intelligent and that's cool, but it won't stop anyone having an opinion," Malfoy shrugged. "You think I'm being awful when really I'm preparing you of the reality. I have a reputation and you're practically nobody, Saskia."

In honesty, I was surprised he even remembered my name. Like, he had a point. Girls in this castle were vicious and I know I have a lot of things for them to be vicious about. But in that moment, I decided to honour Al and just have the confidence to do something a little bit daring for once in my life.

"What's life without a bit of pressure?" I said, evenly. Or at least what I hoped was evenly. My palms were a bit sweaty and I really was trying not to think about what I was doing for longer that three seconds. "Just hope you know, regardless of the bet, you owe me. I like chocolate frogs, books and white lilies. Also, I accept financial donations, too."

To my surprise, Malfoy laughed. Not even a fake laugh because he pitied me. But a genuine one and even I, Saskia Prendergast, cracked a smile. Even though I wasn't remotely funny, I was glad the awkward atmosphere had gone. Sure, it was impossible that Zayn and I were going to be anything other than... People sharing a common secret that I wasn't really his girlfriend. I was here to do him a favour and he was paying me with chocolate frogs (he doesn't know this yet) and in honesty, I may as well have considered prostitution because that was clearly where this was headed. But nevertheless, I like people finding me funny as it is a fact that I am not and never will be remotely humorous.

"So yeah, um, there's a Hogsmede weekend this weekend and I'm not telling you that you have to be there, but you sort of do." This was the first time I'd heard Malfoy stutter and I relished it. Ah, pretty people, they're just like us, too. "It's our first date. We won't be alone. Al will be there."

"Er, that might be a problem."

"Why? Are you busy?" Seriously, he didn't need to sound so shocked that I had a life and that there was the possibility that I actually did have plans. I didn't, but that wasn't the point. I'd sort of like people to think I'm cooler than I am.

"No, there's just this really unattractive thing called my face," I shrugged. "I'm not exactly like your usual type. Girls like me don't wake up flawless."

Malfoy laughed again. "I'm sure we can figure something out."

"What else does this whole thing entail?" I asked, curious, finally picking up the courage to sit down on one of the chairs across from him. "I'm not really sure what to expect."

"Neither do I," Malfoy admitted. He really was a good looking guy. I felt inferior in his presence. Which wasn't that cool. "We just have to be seen together, spend some time together and try and look like a couple. I know that's going to be awkward. We don't really know each other- actually, tell me about you. There's a start, I suppose."

"Um, not to be rude, but we've been in the same school year since we were 11," I snarkily said, but he merely rolled my eyes. "I'm Saskia Prendergast and I'm awkward and I'm top of every class."

"You're very smart. The only person I know who beats Rose Weasley off the top spot."

"Yeah, maybe," I said, with yet another shrug. "I study hard and my social life is completely lacking because of it. Not that I mind because at the end of the day, my liver isn't going to be ruined later in life and I'm not as likely to age prematurely due to the fire whiskey drank at Quidditch celebrations."

For some reason, Malfoy just nodded, taking all the information in. "That is a good way of looking at it."

Wow, he actually was being reasonably civil. Was this what being in a relationship was like? You both had to mutual agree on things and stuff? I don't know. The last relationship I had was in primary school and the guy ate his own snots.

"Tell me more."

This was starting to feel like an interview- Wait? Is this an interview? What the _fuck?_

Instead of questioning it, I just answered him, rattling off some pointless information. "I'm an only child and my parents are both muggles. Er, I was born in December and I like chocolate frogs more than people. I like potions and runes. Oh, and I had the hugest crush on Al's older brother for four years after I met him. But don't tell him that."

Merlin's baggy Y-fronts, Saskia. This isn't bloody confessional. Next you'll be on your knees and repenting your sins and begging for forgiveness.

"Actually, I retract that statement. You can tell him if you like. He's used to being fawned over."

Malfoy smirked and as soon as I noticed his smirk, I hated it and wanted to smack it from his face. It was a smirk that suggested he knew something you didn't. A smirk that made you consider committing murder. "And wipe that bloody look of your face before I do it for you," I pouted, slumping down in the arm chair and looking away from him.

"You're observant, that's good." What was this? Break Saskia down just to build her back up again? Dude, literally ten minutes ago you were calling me a tragedy!

"Uh, yeah, one of my many talents..."

Again, smooth.

"And just sarcastic as sarcastic as I am," Malfoy's smirk transformed into a smile. "We might just get along."

And just before I can comprehend what's happening he's leaning over the table and kissing me.

 **Second time editing this. Hoping to have chapter two up soon. This idea has been in my head sooooo long people. Also, hiya, I haven't been writing in a while. Read and review and all that.**

 **I love you more than musicals, FoB and ugly coats.**


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